Inner Strength

I guess the only part of my life that is going well right now, is the fact that my heart is still beating and I wake up to realize I am breathing.

And also, maybe, one more point to be happy about is that I drew perfect eyes today. I’m sorry. Moodless face on.

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I remembered reading this essay about Grass; its will of survival and the strength it possesses. The higher Chinese essay was repleted with tough words. But it contained this particular phrase that somehow seemed to be etched in my mind even till now.

“Can you imagine, such a tiny blade of grass that can be easily bent in strong wind, can withstand a human stepping on it. This grass, has such a strong will to live that it stretches its roots far far into the ground, to stand up firmly, strongly, against all the elements.”

And so from then I realized life, simply is the most beautiful thing. And all living things are made to cherish it. So must I.

I need to let go of pain. Especially the people who caused it.

Also, that annoying hater who conscientiously reads all my blog posts wishing that I die somehow. I won’t be replying you anymore because it’s not worth it. I hope you go do something more remarkable with the time spent.

Well, Good luck to myself. Your only best friend, is one looking back at you in the mirror.

City of dreams :O

all that glitters is not gold.

Hola pitches I am back~

Yes I went to catch Pitch Perfect 2. Like WTS… reminds me of J. It was still a decent movie, albeit the cheesy lines… But you know you can’t complain when Anna Kendrick floods most of the screen time with her unworldly beauty.

So… I went to Macau recently. Call me ignorant but it was my first time there. I never found the need to take my wanderlust down to a place filled with casinos; Because I don’t gamble.

Ironically I went to Macau to take part in the GCE exhibition as part of an event job under the grace of an old friend. If you are not ambitious like me, who believes I’ll never be rich enough to make it to Las Vegas, you should certainly find time to give Macau a go. Its beautiful. Not completely unexpected, but will still awe you.

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Let me take you on a pretty visual journey of my short trip there. YAY MY STORY BEGINS.

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Once upon a time, your goddess had to lug her extremely heavy VS luggage along with her ROG (4.3kg excluding charger) and still have to look dainty in order to complement her ST bag. She took public transport to the airport. It was a journey of sweat and blood.

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I know right… Leather skirt, cropped top with a gaming lappy mashes up with a totally irrelevant soft pink bag. And a pair of staggeringly high stilettos.

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Goodbye kiss to my baby. He dat poor thing. Only spent close to 4 days with me in the entire of May.

I couldn’t resist toast box’s laksa. I felt guilty after the first spoonful of delicious gravy because I had a pre ordered meal on board. I took tiger. Well… direct flight + excellent timing. Why not!

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I mean no offense to Tiger Air, but really, the food sucks. Not only is the packaging damn terrible… Do you know those silky tofu that you can buy from NTUC that comes in this white plastic box with ridges and a transparent film on top. Just imagine this costs you about 9 bucks on board the flight. No tofu, but Contains barely edible rice and cardboard that tastes suspiciously like vacuumed dried chicken.

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MACAUUUUUUUU IA~~

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You know there’s this movie where someone got mistaken for a celebrity and then embarks on the “celebrity” life. I felt like that the moment I stepped out of the arrival gate. There was a man waiting for me. In a suit and tie. Holding a beautiful signboard. Not those makeshift paper scribbled in dried sharpie. But a proper board, with my name printed out firmly and surely.

Amber Tan.

What? Is that for me?

I pretended not to look fazed as T (my friend) did mention pick up will be arranged. No, it wasn’t mistaken identity. I knew I was staying at Banyan Tree. The man had the BT logo on his chest. He looked at me politely and took my luggage.

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LOL i probably seemed like some crazy stalker to passerbys whilst i snapped this.

Ok are we going to board some kind of Hotel catered mini bus or what.

no.

no it wasnt.

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It was a freaking Mercedes Limo. What in the actual fuck.

Wat.

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They had bottled water by the sides and fresh wet towels spritzed with a hint of the iconic tea tree scent. Truly BT.

“How was your flight, Ms Amber?” The chauffeur asked in such an impossibly polite way I almost teared up.

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Is this how Paris Hilton travel every day. Man, how many people get to actually experience this in their lifetime?

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I caught sight of Galaxy. Its kinda like this Trinity of multi billion enterprises. If memory did not fail me, I think its 3 companies and their sister groups joining forces to create the mega wonder called Galaxy. And I will be staying, in the Banyan Tree Villa.

Trust me, I wasn’t exactly sure what to expect. But according to T, the employer who hired me is a high roller at the Galaxy, and thus the Villa is complimentary. Not sure how high he rolls but….

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The villa: 

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Living area. Well HE CERTAINLY ROLLS SO HIGH, INTO THE STRATOSPHERE.

The living room is almost half of my house. Everything is elegantly set, with an oriental touch. Glass windows separates the space from an outdoor private pool, mezzanine area and jacuzzi. The sofa seats are comfy and welcoming. Room was delightfully lit to a soft warm glow.

A welcome snack/fruit cage (supposed to be a platter but its in the shape of a cage) + complimentary wine adorned the coffee table. THEY FUCKING HAVE FASHION TV OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG.

Master bedroom

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An opulent bed nestled in the middle of the room. It was a King sized bed with intricate thread-counts and earth colored pillows. Everything was tastefully made to complement each other.

Massage room

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Kinda looks like coffins from here HA HA HA OMG. Apparently when you are earning too much money and refuse to mix with dem mortals, you can call for In-room massage services. AND GUESS WHAT. the stay comes with 4 complimentary 90mins massages. I wanted to take all 4 but I had time constraint >.>

I TOOK 3 HOURS HA HA HA. I NEVER KNEW I COULD FEEL LIKE A REAL GODDESS OK.

Mini bar

macau 23 Bottled water, espresso shots, arrays of TWC teabags, chocolates, wines, take your pick!

Master bedroom’s toilet

YOUR OWN FREAKING SAUNA IN THE TOILET.

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Because yes, just in case you are shy (or kinky) and want to do nude sauna in private.

A shower area overlooking the pool. Floor tiles of cool marble, and perfectly smoothed stone walls.

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BECAUSE YES YOU CAN HAVE YOUR OWN JET BATH. YOUR OWN JACUZZI WITH COLORED LIGHTS OF YOUR CHOICE.

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I did get permission to use the jacuzzi and sauna. OH MY GOD. THAT WHOLE BIG TUB TO MYSELF. With the bubbles and oscillating jet sprays. All that was missing.. were a couple of naked, feisty, cute young virgin boys. HA HA HA HA

My room (Guest bedroom)

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I assume its for 2, but it fits 4. As usual, beautiful sheets and a comfortable glow. Two queen beds. Guess which one I took. HAHAHA. BUT FUCK I CAN LIE HORIZONTALLY ACROSS BOTH BEDS IF I WANTED TO.

Its my toilet on the left of the cupboard. But I just had to take a photo of the door. Because its so gorgeous. Reminds me of those Gu Dai China shows. Lolol.

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They have two types of bathrobes. One lightweight and silky, the other cottony and thick. Comes with matching bath slippers.

The toilet is heaven. To nobody’s surprise, I spent most of my free time in the toilet.

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The entire villa has this moat concept used in those medieval castles. Beautiful pool tiles covered the moat and gave the “Your fucking room is on top of water” feel. You can bathe naked (duh) and stare out at the placid water. It’s serene and peaceful. I like water. just not when its trying to drown me.

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Hell yeah did your goddess SOAK THE SHIT OUT OF THE BATH TUB.

Just in case you are lazy to clean yourself, fret not! Neorest is here. With a gentle push of button, you can now have a stream of warm water to help sanitize  your ass. Want it higher? no problem. Harder? Sure!!! How about with rhythmic pattern.

Finally, make your ass feel right at home by blasting it dry with a warm “Ass dryer”. The toilet bowl is equipped to blow em dry. Never had the habit of flushing? Don’t worry. Once the bowl detects you are leaving, it flushes and then the lid goes down on its own.

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I can safely say it was the most conducive shitting environment ever.

Outdoor pool

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It rained pretty much all the time so i hardly had the chance to swim outdoors. But I did squeeze in a few laps here and there and also got the chance to dip in the outdoor Jacuzzi. Pity I was unable to fulfill my kinky dream of stark swimming and lazing in the Jacuzzi with dem jets teasing my nips because IMAGINE THE BOSS WALKS IN. I WILL GET FIRED and/or IT BECOMES A REAL TIME PORN MOVIE.

Just kidding. He had his wife/gf with him so it was all cool.

I was in a red bikini 😀

The Jacuzzi was really really beautiful, in the heart of the outdoor space, encased completely in glass with water so clear, you can see the merry stream of bubbles going up. It was my favorite thing in the whole villa (second to the toilet bowl)  I lied there for quite abit, enjoying the heat in the middle of a rainy day.

AND GUESS WHAT I HAD TO SLEEP IN THE WHOLE DAMN PLACE ALONE FOR THE FIRST NIGHT. I HAD IT ALL TO MYSELF OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG.

I included a short video lolol.

The Venetian

this is another hotel chain, supposedly built to mimick Venice because the owner’s wife is in love with the architectural design there. He has another one in Las Vegas. This one is larger than the one in Las Vegas!. Freaking awesome man. For those of you who actually paid attention to your social studies book in secondary school just like me, you will find remarkable resemblance to those pictures in the textbook.

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Its like you are teleported to another era. The whole place is mesmerizing. Gold IS the primary color. The high ceilings are decked with intricate paintings that told stories.

EVEN THE TOILETS

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The courtyard too is not spared from the erudite detailing.

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For history lovers, Im pretty sure you know what this mock-up is. It is the mini version of the actual tower, St Mark’s Campanile. It was used as a watch tower in Venice, Italy and considered one of their landmarks.

The designers really did put in their best effort to make imitation of the real Venice down to the T! But I am pretty sure the water in Venice isn’t as clear, and neither are the buildings as new and shiny. I would love to visit them one day, however.

I had my first meal of the trip at the Venetian. It was Portuguese.

macau 39 macau 40 T was with me to pass me my pass and work brief so he brought me to this restaurant. It’s pork knuckle with mustard and Portuguese fried rice. It was my first time trying the cuisine but well I guess my tastebuds weren’t a fan. Still delicious tho.

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Galaxy at night~

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One of my favorite restaurants was actually the one at Banyan Tree called Saffron. Staying in the villa entitles free daily breakfast there for up to 4 guests. Being a cheapo aunty obviously I went there to settle all my breakfasts hehehe.

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Saffron:

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I really loved the spread. The array of food choices varies daily except for the few staples such as cereals and fruits. What makes it fantastic is that both the western and eastern food are done equally well. And the ingredients are all really fresh and wholesome. I had many bowls of porridge and 3rds of fruits. Just look at how well matched the fruits are. Colorful and certainly whets anyone’s appetite.

They have a huge table of decanters filled with all kinds of Freshly squeezed juices. Yummy~

And yes I did knock myself out with the Cheese board and cuts of ham. The smoked salmon is also one of the most memorable. Different from those usually found in salads and hotel buffets, this smoked salmon is perfectly smoked with just a tinge of salt. Thus, you can eat slice after slice without feeling like your kidney has died.

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Well. You didn’t think I was just there to be a princess right. Your goddess still has to work~

G2E Asia

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Many gaming giants were there. I saw a local company and also our well loved Konami. lol

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Just in case you are wondering, its an automated Baccarat dealer.

Here’s a clip of how it works. LOL.

_

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I felt the 4 power ranger colored girls looked pretty odd on the screen. But the red one is hot tho.

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Its a digital world now man. Even the girls are merely just recording and streaming it online. It actually does beat sitting at the table dealing for hours.

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The machines are free to play as to give potential buyers a feel of how it works. I love playing plants vs zombies so as to nobody’s surprise I actually slacked there for quite long spinning LOL.

AND VERY OBVIOUSLY I HAVE TO SHOW YOU, THAT I AM THE “MANAGER” OF THE COMPANY.
(It was actually just that the admin girl filled it up wrongly.) HAHAHA.


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FEELS GOOD TO BE A MANAGER THO.

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Wynn hotel:

This is a beautiful and classic hotel with a touch of elegance. There’s a bigger one in Las Vegas. Sadly, the owner has passed 😦

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Had lunch at their noodle house. They are famous for their duck.

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The roasted duck pancake was only average much to my disappointment because the waitresses forgot about it and thus it was cold when served. However the BBQ pork was just too good. I slurped up everything.

One part of the Wynn’s gallery had this beautiful but strange looking thing.

The ceiling as pictured here, is extremely detailed carvings of the 12 zodiacs.

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Right below it, is something that looks like the tip of a globe, but looking at the suggestive lines, I suspected it will open up.

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And it did! It was a performance that occurs every half hour. Its actually just a golden dragon on a moving platform but it was so majestic that everyone was snapping away.

BEING AN AUNTY YES I RECORDED IT HAHAHAHA. The atmosphere when you are there, wow. You cant feel it from the video tho. Just hear the Prcs making sound effects. HAHAHA

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Dinner at Wynn,
Ristorante Il Teatro

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its a pretty sassy Italian fine dining place. Boss decided to give us a treat. Thus a few of his workers went, T was there too. and whilst some took the cosy booth seats, I was asked to sit by the large glass windows overlooking a super huge fountain. They said “Its your first time here. You need to sit there.”

I wuz liek, wai???? DID I DO SOMETHING WRONG. IS THERE SOMETHING FUNNY THATS GONNA HAPPEN IF I SIT THERE. IS IT A PRANK. AM I BEING OSTRACIZED OR CONDEMNED.

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But there weren’t any GAGS-ish prank. It  was how I watched the best water performance of my life. It was so beautiful!!!

Turn up your speakers. The song is in synchronization with the water jets. It gets exciting at around 0.32!

I was so enthralled. Captivating bro. I want to go and lie in the middle of it. The boss added I was very lucky because that was the best performance out of the few that the hotel has. HAHA.

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SO OK BACK TO THE DINNER. The food there was… well fine dining. HAHA.

This was my favorite dish. Generous and well seasoned Foie Gras with pear sauce. ITS FREAKING AWESOMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

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I had mushroom soup. For my main course, I ordered short necked clams with queen scallops risotto. It was really tasty and the rice was skillfully simmered. However, the only disappointment was that the dish was too salty. I couldn’t finish it. I finished 3 glasses of water just to get to half of the plate.

macau 81macau 82macau 80 3Their complimentary sweet; a gummy and a chocolate with nut inside. I really loved that little board. Wanted to smuggle it home. LOLOL

This is the link to the restaurant, in case you wanna bring your date there. Btw, its not cheap. D:

http://www.wynnmacau.com/en/restaurants/ristoranteilteatro.html

Feel free to bring me there too. LOL. I DONT MIND BEING A LIGHTBULB.

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Wuz dotaing there. Well nothing can stop the goddess from her feeding sprees… NOT EVEN 4.3kgs.

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Yes whilst spending time in the glorious toilet before going to work I realized the lighting was so good and it made my skin look perfect. I HAD TO TAKE A SNAP Oh myyyyyyyyy.

Do i look like I am balding or wat.

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Hotel Okura, Yamazato restaurant.

It turns out T managed to close a deal so he decided to bring me to this really nice restaurant Okura, which is within Galaxy itself, right beside Banyan Tree.

He said he has only been there once with his girlfriend but it was so good, he wanted to bring me there since it was my last night at Macau.

It was my favorite out of all my food escapades there. The food was too good and makes you reminisce about the flavors and textures long after its digested.(and excreted) HAHA.

The lift lobby at 28th feels like you have been encapsulated into space. The walls are glittery.

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Really good sashimi. Salmon belly, tuna and yellowtail. The lady told me that the flowers can be eaten. And so I tried it. HAHAHA.

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Very good grilled codfish.

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I thought nothing of sushi. As you know, I hate rice. And it looks fairly decent in the photo right? BUT IT IS SO GOD DAMN DELICIOUS. The chef did not use a shit load of rice. It was all packed with fish, soft shell crab, etc.

It was so good. I really loved the soft shell crab one with the roe on top.

Here’s more information about the restaurant.

http://www.okura.com/overseas/china_hongkong/okura_macau_restaurant/

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I was really really happy when I was there. Felt good to spend a few days in ephemeral luxury. HAHAHA. I hope you guys enjoyed the pictures and will be planning a vacation there soon. Its worth it!. (btw the SASA there is fucking cheap)

See you guys soon. I am about 70% done with my mermaid story. Its abit too long. Trying to cut down on my avid imagination that transforms into lengthy descriptions.

I love you and thanks for supporting my blog 🙂
(even the hater who consistently reads and leaves his hateful comments)

I FOUND NEMO OK!!!!!!!

HI GUYS YOUR GODDESS IS BACK.

I didn’t drown nor get eaten by sharks nor get stuck in the propeller wheel as some hater hoped for. I enjoyed every single moment of my diving trip to tioman. Holy camel, you guys need to add diving to your bucket list. ITS FREAKING AWESOME AND LIKE YOU GET TO SEE HOW FISHES ACTUALLY ARE LIKE BEFORE THEY END UP WITH GINGER AND SOY SAUCE ON YOUR TABLE.

but wait, before i start my long and naggy story; I need to fucking exclaim WHY MY DICK POST (the MAYFLY one) has so many views?!?!?/ All you freaking perverts come just to see the dick pic. holy shit. y’all naughty lil fucks.
OK SOOOOOOO ONCE UPON A TIME

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I took my diving course with LEEWAY (you can google it, quite legit ok). The price includes everything such as transport to tioman, diving lessons + license + food + lodging + gear rental.

The really cute (but rather cranky) mini bus took us to Mersing jetty. FRIDAY NIGHT CUSTOMS DAMN JAMMED OK JUST LETTING U KNOW ITS MADNESS. WAT IS AIR BRO. i couldn’t breathe when I was queuing to get through the automated gantry.

The mini bus made a pit stop at a random petrol kiosk to refuel. It kinda reminded me of the fun days with Z as he drove from KL to JB. I’ll wait in the car as he heads to the convenience store, coming back with tidbits for me.

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Ya sorry its a fucking cheesy pose but hell its 11pm I have insomnia. who the fuck cares.

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We are at the jetty late at night, with no one else except for a grumpy cat and god damn cockroaches.

Finally, after a really scary cockroach made an appearance, our boat is here. The heroic man who saved me from the 6 legged horror had some leftover carcass juice on his slipper.

All of us walked to the pier. It was pitch black. We then boarded this extremely mini speedboat driven by this guy who looks like pudge. He’s the literal Asian pudge. I think he took up half of the maximum allowed weight. As our boat sped off in the speed of light but with no lights. it was really, truly, black, blacker than my face when I realized my fridge is empty. Images of us crashing like Titanic kept flooding my mind. I wondered how our pudge navigated so confidently.

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A funny shot of our dear Juehua hahaha.

That was taken when we boarded the larger fleet from the small speedboat. Its our actual dive boat that we will be using for all of our dives. Pretty cool!!!

I think some of the boatmen live on the boat.

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I got really excited when I saw all the air tanks neatly lined up, ready to be used.

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bunk beds! just like in those star cruises that gong gong used to take me on. hahahaha.

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We finally reached the lobby of Berjaya hotels and Resorts. It’s too late to see anything but like wtf at 2am in the night you see a freaking woman standing alone in the eerily quiet lobby. PONTIANAK OMG

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I don’t know who the hell will put a mannequin there but seriously that shit is no joke.

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But okay la the other side of the lobby looks pretty good. Has that woody nature feel. I really like it. It feels like a haven to relax in, get back in touch with Earth and forget about your bills.

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This beautiful picture was taken by Yama when we arrived. The night sky there is really beautiful. The stars were out. It felt like someone had dusted glitter all over the celestial skies, creating an accidental starry masterpiece.

My buddy (Shirley) and I bunked up with another trainee diver from another school. Hes in his early forties i think? And he wears nothing but an underwear to bed. its pretty cute. HAHA

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Some pictures of how our little huts look like. Its adorable. Quaint and cosy, has that back-to-basics feel that I really adore except that there’s grass.

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Just imagine, they are still using the old fashioned door knocker. HAHAHAHA.

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Pardon my unkempt and lackluster appearance. It’s kind of silly to put full make up and dive into 10 meters of saltwater. unless you’re telling me that nemo is a millionaire. Hell, I’ll even don high heels to visit him.

There’s this main foodhall where all the buffets (paid for in the package) are conducted. Man, it’s quite the spread, although it contains certain dubious looking malaysian-ish food.

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I know… I’m a freaking pig. I had another bowl of porridge after that. HAHA

Just wanted to show you guys a few more photos of the resort, Its really scenic and for us Singaporeans and city folks, its totally like a fresh new perspective.

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Just looking at the clarity of the sea, its almost unbelievable that such a place is so affordable and pretty easy to get to. Look at the (is that a mountain..) It probably contains tigers and poisonous snakes but who cares it looks gorgeous from afar :’D

And yes… Yama enjoys being in most of my photos.

We were learning navigation… Look at that compass. Ain’t nobody got time to learn that shit. It took me awhile :”D as you all know, your goddess can’t do topography to save her life (literally) and that pretty much includes the innate ability to read a compass.

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YES I JUST HAD TO SHOW YOU MANY PHOTOS OF THE SPARKLING CRYSTAL CLEAR WATER. 

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Do i look like a technician… I think I do. I look like those fireman who’s on their break. yes, stop staring at Shirley’s boobs.

THIS IS LIKE A HORRENDOUSLY UGLY PHOTO OF ME BUT its the only one i’ve got that isn’t blurred as the boat is speeding D:

diving 37 diving 39 diving 40Yes that’s our dear hulk.

It’s a nice feeling to be on the dive boat. The span of sea lies generously sprawled in front of you with such vast serendipity. 
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I can’t really describe how does it feel like to be staring at the open water. < >
But looking at that clear liquid, its so welcoming. It’s beckoning you to take a dip and let the therapeutic waves carry your thoughts far away. (hopefully it doesn’t carry you far away too)

You know whats the best feeling? Its when you are finning lying on your back against the water, staring up at the endless sky. Its such a serene stretch of picturesque delight that is just ineffable. The sky seem to run forever and ever, creating this thin line of a horizon that merges with the sparkling sea. I couldn’t hear anything, other than the boat buzzing along. But the beauty of what was in front of me was so deafening. I felt so utterly embraced by nature that I really wanted to protect it when I remembered how dangerous it can be, yet still rendered defenseless in the hands of us humankind.

So soppy literature aside, all of us entered the water via Giant Stride. I think it’s an adrenaline rush (and pretty scary) when you are all geared up and standing at the edge of the boat because all the thoughts of asphyxiation and great whites start flooding your mind. But really to hell with it. Nothing is scarier than a flying cockroach. PLOP and down we go!

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It’s amazing down there. (that’s what she said)

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SEE THE TURTLE. i did not take these photos. Most of them are from Yama, or Kelvin, our dive instructor. I DID NOT SEE THE TURTLE THERE AND THEN HOWEVER BECAUSE MY MASK HAD SOME PROBLEMS. Well well. 😥

YES THATS ME HAHAHAHAHA I look like a retard with the mask on.

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The sea is so quiet… actually it made sense. Imagine the marine life can talk. Dem fishes gon be like

“Omg, did you hear about Julie? I heard she slept with like, a grouper. Isn’t that illegal?”
“Pfft, Susan’s spots are so much prettier than mine. ”
“Mum, MUM DO NOT EAT ME I WILL GROW UP TO BE STRONG. ”
“What’s for dinner hon? I gotta stay back at our reef with the other dads. It’s hide-n-reef game day tonight.”

DONT LAUGH I SWEAR THATS WHAT THEY ARE PROBABLY GONNA TALK ABOUT.

Showing you some beautiful photos:

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Freaking sea urchins. they are everywhere.

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Blue spotted manta ray. ITS RARE OK AND IT SWAM SO FAST AND DAMN SWAG

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We found nemo and he doesn’t look too happy to see people peeking at him. I guess this wasn’t the one that acted in the movie. HA HA.

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I really liked the resort. Also because the food and service is not too shabby!

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Just your average crazy guys eating half a tub of ice cream. I don’t know why the fuck they did that. but i dont think their stomachs are pleased with such a magnificent choice of ice cream explosion.

I was constantly hungry after dives, thank god for potato.

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So yes, that was the summary of my Tioman diving trip. I strongly urge you guys to go learn diving. You will definitely fall in love with the special world… 12 feet under the buzz of your every day life. My macau trip will be coming up soon :’D

Sorry for the long hiatus guys. Your goddess has been doing some serious travelling xD

MAYFLY REALLY FAST

1D3_2000

Recent photo from a shoot. I really love the shadows and textures of this one so i made it black and white. Kinda like my signature. hahaha.

So in case you guys don’t know, I am learning diving!!! ITS DAMN FREAKING AWESOME I AM GOING TIOMAN THIS WEEKEND OK. Stay tuned for my diving trip update.

I love all of you.

OH WAIT I NEED TO SHOW YOU GUYS THIS ITS NSFW BUT REALLY

So this guy sent me a photo of his penis. I have no idea why.

wtfpenis

LOLOLOLOL.  Sorry i made you guys look at it. >.> BUT REALLY
WHAT U NAME?

poetic sorrow.

Letter to his next gf:

Please remember to make him coffee every night after work, he likes it with a spoonful (or less) of sugar and it has to be with milk.

He likes head massages, not to hard, slightly ticklish.

I hope you buy him 2 tangoes and ward mid for him. Hes so good with invoker, you’d never want to watch anyone else again.

He likes you to wait for him at home as he comes back from work; give him a hug and don’t let him eat too much macdonalds.

Ferrero Rocher is kind of like the most convenient chocolate that he likes. Buy him plenty because he gobbles everything.

Nuzzle his cheeks and kiss his lips because they are so soft. He’ll love it.

He loves to sleep. But he’ll love to lie beside you whilst you do your stuff. Just be quiet as he is a light sleeper.

Always shower him with praises, because he always think lowly of himself.

I hope you’ll shower him with plenty of patience, love and understanding because he isn’t a social creature. He will keep things in his heart and just drown in his own negative emotions if you don’t ask him over and over again. He’s very insecure but extremely observant, so he knows what you’re thinking and feeling even without you saying it. Watch his Chinese dramas with him, it’ll make him happy. Cuddle him to sleep because he’s a snuggler. Don’t engage in infidelity.. you will really break his heart. And lastly, don’t ever buy him branded stuff. Buy him computer gadgets or steam credits. 😉

I can promise you, if you give him all of the above, he will be the best boyfriend you’ll ever have.

Sadly, fate has it that our affinity has to end. So I hope you can love him more than I had.

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Emptiness seeps in, a relentless trickle,
like death, with his unforgiving sickle.
I wished to unlive, yet at hell’s door,
Satan whispered “Living will torment you more.”

It was that one, of a thousand roses,
that pricked me with such lethal doses.
With our dying waltz, as tears clouded,
I tore his thorns out of skin that smarted.

Was it not, poison that tainted my lung?
The fumes exhaled, of his beauty I sung,
Why had it to be, two in a tragedy,
One to move on, the other with no remedy.

Did we all choose to be in love with pain,
or was it that love definitely came
With one full jug and one bottomless jar,
And the acquiescent heart for the fuller to mar.

Blogging on a sad Saturday night. With the empty room, not even Lycan by my side. Oh… sorrow. Sometimes pain hurts so much we sink into a masochistic thirst for more.

I hope you will always be happy.

one way ticket to a deviant muse

balloon girl

They always say to pursue your dreams because passion is what keeps us alive. Yet hypocritically, people who chase their dreams are often labelled deluded, or impractical.

But it’s true isn’t it? As the world ages, it seems our dreams are harder to reach. Like a distant star, like a fleeting cloud. We’d always be that little child, with stubby legs, trying to chase the runaway balloon. I want to hold on to my dream. I want to catch the last bit of the string that’s attached to the helium orb. I want to stray from the pathway illuminated by safe streetlights and proverbial road signs along the way.

I want to trudge through that thicket of thorns, of twisted fate. But time isn’t on my side 😦
A woman’s beauty is exquisite because its ephemeral.

It’s tiresome to brave through everything that strains me. Mentally, emotionally, physically. How long more can I withstand the castigation? I need a pillar of strength. But now that I am older I finally realized something. More than often, the one you need is hardly the one you want. 😥

If you think about it, Love is expensive. 

a lloyd of mosquitoes.

Hi guys your goddess Is almost near the end of her crazy work week. 😀

I will be doing the same event at Cineleisure on 1,2,3 of May, and Jcube on 8,9,10th. Please do pop by to have a photo taken with me if you happen to be free 🙂

I have been down with a terrible stomach flu so please forgive me, this post won’t be my usual long and naggy one. (is that like a good thing? are you hoping i will always have stomach flu in this case? HAHA)

IV bought me a lovely belated birthday present. He got it from Japan. Oh my… I am a very very lucky girl. You know what, who the fuck cares what people want to say behind my back? (Reminds me of A’s brother in the past.) In the end, I am the one smiling happily with my presents in hand. Hateful words mean nothing.. especially on the internet xD

Its my dream bag! I have been staring at it for ages. Its the Samantha Thavasa Lady Azayle in light pink. OH MY GOD WHY ITS SO BEU TI FOO

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It has a freaking hidden slot for idk what u wanna put into (Look at the picture above) at the base of the bag. Maybe a secret credit card or some condoms LOL :’D

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DO YOU KNOW THAT THE KEYS CAN BE INSERTED INTO THE LOCK ON THE BAG ALTHOUGH THATS PRACTICALLY FUNCTIONAL BUT USELESS SINCE IT DOESN’T REALLY LOCK ANY SHIT

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IV threw in some Japanese goodies for me as well. So adorable. HAHAHA.

YES tell me that you are in love with that bag too. Miranda Kerr has one! But yeah well fuck having the same bag doesn’t make me any step closer to being as hot as her. Damn.

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Anyway yes I forgot to add that Mr Lawyer brought me to this lovely restaurant in the middle of nowhere that sells excellent cantonese food. Doesn’t agree with my sick stomach but who the fuck cares. MINCED MEAT OK. Please don’t ask me why are his eyes always semi closed I DON’T KNOW. It’s his signature pose. 5.4 jiu shi bu yi yang. HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA HES GOING TO KILL ME NOW.

I did a photoshoot at Lloyd’s Inn. Its at Killiney Road near Somerset 313. (It’s near LKY’s house)

Had some yoghurt before that and saw the little boy in front of me eating like… I don’t know if he was even trying to fit the spoon into his mouth. HAHAHA ITS SO ADORABLE OK SORRY I SNAPPED A SECRET PHOTO OF YOU. BUT I AM NOT A PEDO I JUST THINK ITS CUTE. DON’T REPORT ME TO THE POLICE. 

st7st8I can’t wait to receive the photos. The photographer and I had lots of fun. He was looking at the stethoscope and clipboard that I bought. And he said “No shit, nurse game so serious” HAHAHAHAHA.

We got the Patio room because the skyrooms were fully booked. It’s like those minimalist + earthy room design and it’s beautiful.

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I really loved the outdoor toilet that has a touch of Nature. Abit hot la, but still very serene and calming. But really, the mosquitoes.. abit last warning. Maybe cuz it rained that night.

There’s nothing better than the photographer saying “Okay… you are allowed to keep the room” and then you wave goodbye to him, strip, shower, don the comfy bath robe and roll around on the soft bed. YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

My life is complete.

st14Okay la, Not as complete without free breakfast right!? Lloyd has no kitchen thus they gave a breakfast voucher that allows you to pick either free traditional Chinese kaya toast + eggs + hot drink or top up 7 to have a fancy Angmoh breakfast at Freshly Baked. Its a shop at Dublin road.
Of course I chose the latter la. Z had some odd looking muffin with scrambled eggs, Emmental cheese and smoked salmon. Dat cheese tho… Feels weird with the bunz and all. And coffee instead of wine. HAHAHA.

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I had the classic American breakfast, but I chose sausages instead of bacon. Like… you know, I love sausages. I MEAN PLS DON’T THINK OF IT IN THE SEXUAL WAY WHAT THE HELL LIKE I GENUINELY LIKE TO EAT SAUSAGES. LIKE, GERMANS, SPICY ITALIAN (I DON’T MEAN IT THAT WAY I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE THINKING”

Sometimes I think my peasants… You guys are really evil. I am such a pure soul. You guys tainted me.

I just want to say thanks to SW for buying such expensive Persimmons for me.. my favorite fruit. I don’t understand why the box so big, and only two tiny fruits inside.

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Feel free to buy me more of them guys. I love it very much. DONT COME AND ASK ME “Wanna taste my fruit?” HAHAHAHAHA.

I’ll update again this week. ❤ Take care guys

the weather is hot.

Not as hot as me but ya’ll know its quite the contest.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA OKAY PLEASE DONT UNFOLLOW ME. HAHAHAHA

Hate mail LOL

Hello guys 😀

I just got my first hate-comment on my blog.

hatemail ftw

Thanks for your long, loving hate mail, for spending time to read (all ) my blogs. I don’t know why you are so angsty but hey, here, have my reaction:

kangaroo sitting

HAHAHAHA. I won’t be typical and say “If you don’t like me, fuck off from me!” Because we all know the best way to get famous is for people to hate you. So please, continue stalking me out of hatred and disgust. That internal conflict thrashing within you whilst you read my stuff turns me on.

It’s kind of like how we go like “OMG FUCKING DISGUSTING” looking at a maggot video but we can’t tear our eyes away from it. It’s that kind of shiok.

So…. 😉 I will just watch you drown in your own pity pool of antagonism with all your fellow antagonists. HAHAHAHA.

strutting smug like goddess

IKR> THE BEST GIF.

Diu Lei Ah

Hola guys Your goddess is back.

She survived the 4 days of work with 0 knowledge of Cantonese and her unyielding abhorrence for dim sum. This post gon be long, I spent alot of time editing and writing so y’all lil shits better read each and every word instead of just browsing photos. HAHAHAHA.

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This is totally irrelevant to my trip but you know really, I love my VS luggage, passport cover and the fucking stupid bag that has no zip. Thank god my passport didn’t slip out this time round. Because the hotel room had a safe.

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The rest of them were already in HK so I had to travel alone. And I loved every second of it. Geez, its so much more fun to be sitting on the plane and enjoying than working on the plane. I realized that I didn’t miss working on the plane, I just missed being on the plane. Hahaha.

It was a full load back and forth. I felt secretly happy I wasn’t the one working but okay la, I pity them. Running around looking flabbergasted and stuff.

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I just have to voice out that this doesn’t look or taste like egg. I hope they do something about it :’D It tasted like some angsty chef added his semen into destarched mash potatoes. WHY DID I TAKE PHOTOS OF MY PLANE MEAL? BECAUSE I FUCKING LOVE EATING ON THE PLANE ITS SO ADORABLE LOOK AT THE TRAY AND ALL THE LITTLE CONTAINERS AND THAT LITTLE BREAD ROLL.

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And so it begins I reached HK airport.

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There are China people everywhere. Alot alot of people. Its congested. Jesus christ. What’s everyone here for?

YES I ACTUALLY TOOK THE PUBLIC TRANSPORT ON MY OWN OMG :O THE EXPRESS TRAIN!!!

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I was waiting for the train WHEN I SAW THIS EXTREMELY CUTE GUY (He’s from sg too) AND LIKE WTF DAT FACE. DAT BODY. HEAVEN. I can only watch him from afar and mope because I don’t know him.

NOTICE ME PLZ. PLZ

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Weeping on the train as well because there’s no free wifi. Unlike the one I took at KLIA. HAHAHA.

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I took the cab from Kowloon to The Mira. Tbh I have only been to HK when I was very young so I don’t remember shit. But WHOA totally looks like those HK police drama scenes. Too bad la, I didn’t see Gu Tian Le.

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I need to remind you guys again that I went there for work, so the highlight of the trip was actually the really stunning hotel and the pool facilities.

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The Mira, Hong Kong. (5 stars)
FUCKING GORGEOUS ITS JUST OH SWEET CAMEL.

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Even the water also must be in artistically sculpted plastic.

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So erm in case we were all misunderstanding that I went for a shoot (I initially thought i was as well) But no actually my job was to man a booth and attend some rare coin and notes auction like 007 style.

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I had to learn as much as I can about the Solids, Straights, VF, Gem, UNG, EPQ, whatevers in like a few short hours. This is Queen Elizabeth when she was young!

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My first ever meal there was eaten in a hurry because I had to sit through an auction for Roger, one of the guys who requested for me to bid a particular coin for him.

It was quite delicious, but fucking expensive like the chicken made of gold or smth. BLOODY DRUNKEN CHICKEN COSTS ABOUT 18 SGD. ITS DAMN TINY OK.

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To further demonstrate my road idiocy, I had to get to the place of the auction and exhibition (Holiday Inn) by foot. Something that really puzzles me is how the buildings in HK can look like they barely survived WWII and its right splat in the middle of their supposedly “Orchard” road.

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Halfway through the auction I took a toilet break. Jesus fuck, I dozed off halfway. Luckily the Lot I wanted wasn’t in turn yet. Went to the toilet and realized I looked like shit. I was freezing bro. And not to mention everyone at the auction was either an old aunty or uncle and it was boring as fuck.
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The auctioneer sounded like a sleep therapist and no sadly the coin Roger wanted far exceeded his budget. It was sold for 20k USD. AND THEN THE NEXT LOT I SAW THIS BLOODY COIN GOING FOR 100K USD WHAT THE FUCK WHY CANT YOU JUST GIVE ME THE MONEY.

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Major said the coin is made of Gold, and there are only 21 of such coins minted at that particular time/era. And I wuz liek ok bb I’ma go find dat rich china guy who bought it.

__________________________________________

THEN I HAD STEAMBOAT WITH THE BUNCH OF UNCLES AND AUNTY AND IT WAS HELLISH.

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You know normally when we go for steamboat it’d be liek so awesome with lots of luncheon meat, beef, lamb, fat pork slices and Yuan Yang ( spicy + one chicken broth )

BUT THIS ONE NO. WE HAD CLEAR SOUP, WITH VEGETATION, FISH SLICES WITH BONES, LEAN PORK AND CHICKEN. THE VEGETABLES WERE PLACED IN FRONT OF ME AND YOU KNOW I AM SCARED OF GRASS.

And they were all talking about their prized notes collection whilst I was just forcing a smile and poking my food. I think even hospitals served more flavorful stuff. HA HA HA. SHHH. Don’t tell them.

The Blue Girl beer was good tho.

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But okay it wasn’t so bad, before I had to man the booth the next day, Rick decided to show me around HK. We went to the Peak!

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Took the extremely nerve wrecking tram up the mountain. It was almost a 90 degrees inclination upscale….

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It was foggy as fuck, not sure if It was fresh mountain air or just smokey but terrible HK air.

Got to see their curious buses that run on the tracks and shit.

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Had to do the afternoon shift for the booth, so there was time to dress nice nice, go for lunch (which was supposedly some famous dim sum) before the excruciating work begins.

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Took the MTR to MongKok. The only time I have seen this is when I eat at the Wang Jiao restaurant in SG ;’D

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THE FOOD WAS LIEK SO FANTASTIC. YOUR GODDESS WUZ REALLY EATING DIM SUM , BRO.

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The 3 of us had this overly amazing roast Goose and it costed 30HKD lesser than the FUCKING OVERPRICED DRUNKEN CHICKEN. BIGGER PORTION TOO.

I had my chicken feet that was sprinkled with a copious amount of fried garlic. Its fucking awesome. Char siew pau was so soft and fluffy. They had har gao and all that shit which I really hated. so nope. no photos. HAHAHA. There’s ribs with taro too, Really soft and flavorful loh mai kai and I had my favorite Mango pomelo sago 😀

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I ENDURED SITTING AT THE BOOTH AND TALKING TO AHPEKS FOR HOURS…… YAYYYYYY. Major took me on a tour around the rest of the place. I saw this fucking ancient China bank draft. You know, like those Cheena shows we always watch where the rich men will use this to pay for ridiculous shits.

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I finally had time to go for dessert before going back to the hotel to literally die and sob on my bed. I only had Hui Lai Shan in JB with Z, I doubt Sg has it. I love their mango desserts.

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Again, its fucking overpriced and it’s gigantic. I couldn’t finish it. Its like damn 21 sgd for this shit. DONT EAT THERE. DON’T EAT ANYTHING AT KOWLOON.

__________________________________________

SO YES LET ME JUST TALK ABOUT THE WONDROUS HOTEL AGAIN THE POOL AND TOILET WAS SO DAMN AMAZING THAT I WOKE UP EARLY DESPITE KNOWING THERE’S THE FUCKING BOOTH TO WORK AT JUST TO SWIM.

Oh yeah. I love my bikini LOLOL. Sorry, the photos are pretty blurred because no photo-taking is allowed within the pool facility. I had to sneaky sneaky snap whichever I can.

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There’s the steam bath and the sauna in the Ladies room. Which are both really lovely because its peaceful and there aren’t many rich taitais hanging around.

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The other side of the lounge seats… there’s this beautiful little enclaved Jacuzzi. Everything was so gorgeous I spent way too much time just stoning in there.

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A sneaky shot of the pool and Jacuzzi area outside. The water is freaking WARM and amazing so you don’t have to worry about swimming in freezing water in the mornings.

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YES OMG. THERE IS THIS MAGICAL SWIMSUIT DRYER. you just place your wet bikini inside, close the lid, let it spin around for a few secs AND YOUR SWIMSUIT BECOMES FUCKING DRY.

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LOLOLOL I KNOW IM A FUCKING NERD.

The dressing room was perfectly decorated and well decked with the necessities; Hair dryer, close-up mirrors, cotton pads, lotions, hair sprays etc.

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😉 I know I look amazing. It’s just the lighting. HAHAHAHAHAHHA

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I went to Temple St, Nan Ren Jie and Nu Ren Jie all in one night cuz there wasn’t enough time. >.>

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There’s this whole stretch of tarot card / fortune telling booths along temple street.

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Yes, your superstitious Goddess loves tarot card reading. I picked one random one which looked very gypsy and mythical.

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I asked about love, and picked the shittiest cards ever. However I felt that the tarot card reader was sub standard la. Not trying to console myself. But really >.> Nothing compared to the very awesome reader that approached me 7 years ago.
This card reader was telling me “Oh my god, the love of your life is going to have an affair with another girl. And he doesn’t love you!!! Leave him!!!! ”

The parade for Good Friday was ongoing whilst I was listening to her warn me about dangerous men.

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Yeap that’s some random dude dressing up as the crucified Jesus.

Anyway speaking of which. I was majorly disappointed because there isn’t really anything much to buy in HK. The streets all sell imitation goods which are like Bleh and a weird medley of antiques, paintings, made in china phone accessories and shit.

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Went to “Da Pai Dang” Idk wtf is that in English because I didn’t even know where the fuck I was. So anyway it’s kinda like those roadside stalls you see in BKK and Taiwan selling fresh seafood and tze char, the likes.

It’s basically made to scam rich angmohs la. Rick and I spent about 500 HKD ( that’s about 80 bucks )

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We had Salted fish fried rice, deep fried mantis shrimps with garlic, Stir fried Nai Bai, Bamboo clams and Spring onion + ginger frogs. Was average, in my opinion. I NEED TO GO BANGKOK.

But really, fucking expensive la, 80 Sgd…. >.> I rather use the money to buy avatars in dota 2. LOLLLLLLLLLLLL

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Yes sorry. HI.

Hi. Its me talking about Mira again. The corridors are lovely. Just wanna let you know. HAHAHAHA.

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Spent the few nights in my room finishing up my anime story on ipad. JESUS. TAKESHI IS SO HANDSOME RIGHT OMG. HE STRIPPED IN FRONT OF ME OMG PLS NOOOOOOO TAKESHI KUN.

Work was quite tiring and walking around and shit just wore me out. I didn’t go to LKF (Some clubbing district) Because the old men were, well…. Old men. They just go to bed at 9pm.

There’s nothing more fantastic than lying in your gigantic bed alone, with fluffy pillows and your ipad.

And in your soft bathrobe.

In Mira.

Yes.

I was in heaven.

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Had terrible (and expensive) duck noodles at the same cafe again because I went swimming and was running late for work.

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Thank god Rick took me shopping around Habourcity area after work. Actually it was more like he went shopping and I watched in envy. We queued damn long outside Hermes. He bought some nonsensical overpriced leather cuff for like 2000 sgd.

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And well yes… I got a bra… for like 26 sgd…. talk about difference in net worth. >.>

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It’s overpriced la as usual. Every of the boutique shop there is more expensive than the branches in Sg. So… I guess its a good thing since I am saving money :’D

YES. I AM B 70. NOT A. IM NOT FLAT. THANKS GUYS.

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Yes, a photo of my flight meal on the way back. Its braised beef with blanched vegs and YES REAL MASHED POTATOES, not eggs. The salad was terrifying. Some couscous shit with rock hard chicken.

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My sweetest friend Dominic surprised me with this on board. AHHHH THE PUNS. I ate all the cheese and smiled like an idiot to myself.

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NOTHING BEATS GOING HOME TO YOUR TWO BOYFRIENDS WAITING FOR YOU. YEAH.

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We have reached the end of my super long and relatively boring post about my very “Fantastic” hk trip. :’D

Next up is Kuala Terrenganu. Erm. Well. Let’s see what we can do there except play dota in lanshops and eating ayam goreng all day long.

I love you guys! 😀

My diamond baby :O

Hola darlings.

I have about 8 hours before my flight and here I am playing room escape games. I miss dem days of “I SWEAR I WILL CLICK EVERY SINGLE PIXEL ON THE SCREEN TO FIND THAT KEY.”

My diamond baby is one of the most well structured room escape games (other than the color chamber series) and it comes with a beautiful story. Don’t skip the intro.

If you would like to try it to kill time when you are missing your goddess, play it

http://frame.escapegames24.com/my-diamond-baby.html

You will be able to select the language when the popup box comes up. Don’t use walkthroughs if you can! But i got to admit la, I used the walkthrough for the very last part because I am totally 0% musically inclined. I remember it was my ex who helped me to listen to the music notes (in game) to tell me what was the score sheet that I needed to enter into the mechanism.

If you call for me, I will come to you from wherever I am… Even from my deepest memory. 

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Here, this is how your goddess be lookin for the next 4 days. Chill and awesome as fuck. HA HA HA. No obviously I will be unglam and stuffing my face with food.

❤ good bye guys.