Exploring Melaka

What do you do when you feel like a sad, useless potato that you are?

EAT. E A T

E.A.T

That was literally the entire summary of my trip to Melaka. LOOOOOOOOOOL

STAND ON THE WEIGHING SCALE AND SCREAM “NO REGRETS EVAAAAAAAAA”. Pat your flabby stomach and reminisce all that coconut milkshake.

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So basically the journey was one of deceit and horror because Charles didn’t tell me the actual time taken of the journey is 3 hours bus ride to Melaka Center, 1.5 hours public bus ride to his hometown’s interchange, and another 20 mins to his grandmother’s house.

> 干得非常好 !!!

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I actually bought 3 buns for the 3 of us, but SOMEONE TOOK MY PLASTIC BAG BY MISTAKE when I was travelling on the mrt. God damn, bye buns.

So yes after playing pocket maple for 3 hours straight ( I deleted it after which ) we arrived at the Melaka Sentral.

I keep seeing banners of  “DON’T MESS WITH MELAKA” not sure what that means in political sense but it sounds like MELAKA IS BAD ASS. Charles must have gotten his guai lan attitude from staying in Melaka for so long. HAHAHAHA.

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We had ayam goreng before the trip, but I was already peckish after the ride. AND YES IT ONLY MAKES SENSE TO FOLLOW A MEAL OF UNHEALTHY FAST FOOD WITH THE NEXT MEAL OF ITS’ FELLOW COMPETITIOR, KFC because that’s just only fair.

They have this really awesome mashed potato + corn + cheese + popcorn chicken. I’m not sure about you, but I sure as hell didn’t regret that 100000000 calories sliding down my throat in one glorious, corny, cheesy hot mess.

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So anyway I managed to survive the entire journey and reached his grandma’s house. There’s a long, spindly stretch of forest……………….. down the narrow pathway, the house looms into view. Scary as fuck. I regretted reading so many pontianak stories. D:

But I soon realized it wasn’t the white dressed ghost I was afraid of but FUCKING BEETLES EVERY WHERE AND COCKROACHES AND FLIES AND GIANT ANTS WITH WINGS.

Thank god I am not afraid of the big, overfed lizards that dominate the entire walls.

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That’s a longan tree below, with this white plastic bag wrapped around the fruits.

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One plus point: THEY HAVE 8 DOGS OMG. It was heaven and hell all in one place.

 

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Yes don’t ask me how I did it. I have this special skill of getting dogs to pose for the camera for me. HAHAHAHA.

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I just told him “Lycan, you look like shit. Please act cute for me.” And ta dah! Nailed it.

OK’ ENOUGH OF DIGRESSION ABOUT MY PRO SKILLS. HAHAHA.

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According to Charles, this satay stall is so good that every day, the freshly prepared skewers are all reserved even before the stall is open.

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SO YES TO NOBODY’S SURPRISE, WE DIDN’T MANAGE TO GET IT. WE HAD TO GO ANOTHER STALL.

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Which was also quite good. So I can’t imagine how good the famous stall must be.

 

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I found this photo oddly mesmerizing. A glimpse of the sunset. HEHEHE. JUST TAKEN ON MY iPhone how amazing the photographer is? holy.

We had Malay styled fresh seafood for dinner.

YES, the boy was laughing because I made Charles pose for this photo. HAHAHAHA.

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I just had to play with the squids.

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Fresh on the charcoal grill~

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I am not really used to the cooking methods but nonetheless I had fun feeding the cats. LOL. We had sweet and sour squid, salt grilled fish and sambal sting ray (which is really really different from the Sg ones) lol.

I wasn’t full so we took off to have a second round ; Thai tom yam soup with fresh seafood at another stall. God, it was so good. They put in squids, clams, prawns and crabs. :O

FORGOT TO TAKE A PIC BECAUSE I WAS TOO EXCITED TO GET STARTED.

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Thistle Port Dickson Hotel

KM16 Jalan Pantai , Teluk Kemang, 71050 Port Dickson, Negeri Sembilan, Malaysia

We spent a night here. I always wanted to drop by for a visit.

There were quite alot of people! Probably cuz it was a Saturday. Alot of Sg cars ~.~

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I spent alot of time lounging on the cute little daybed by the window. HEHE.

THEY HAVE TWO POOLS. YAAAAAAAAS. I found the small quiet one, tucked away at the back of the property. WITHOUT SUN BLASTING IN UR FACE.

Some cam whoring moments, taken on Charles’ phone with the oddly enticing filters.

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Sorry. I look pregnant. Ironically its because my period was due. LOL.

We had a really good bak kut teh for lunch before heading to the beach. The dry one is so good,  I was close to tears.

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THE WEATHER WAS SO HOT, you could stick an egg into the sand and it hatches into a chick.

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I love this shot. HEHEHE.

 

So melancholic. Such shots are my favorites. HEHEHE.

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^ That was the sarcastic face Charles was giving me behind these photos. LOL.

The water is quite clear too. Just cloudy because it’s too shallow and the sand gets around. We played on the banana boat, 16 RM per person. It ended too fast but we got slammed into the sea at the end which was quite fun. HAHA.

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We paid 72 rm nett for the BBQ seafood buffet at night. It was a good spread and I thought it was quite worth the money. The dining area was right beside the main pool and it looks so beautiful at night that I was so tempted to take a dip, work off some calories, come back and resume eating. LOL.

They had my favorites; smoked salmon and fresh, cold crayfish.

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I took lamb and black pepper sauce hot off the BBQ pit done by the chef. Potatoes were amazing, and so were the buttered veg.

Had some stir fried teppanyaki styled vegetables. Delicious.

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I had 3 bowls of creamy seafood soup and 2 scoops of mint ice cream to finish off. LOL.

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I was lazy and thus didn’t eat the rest of the grilled items like prawns and crabs. Satay was quite nice.

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We spent the rest of the night chilling at the hotel’s bar called Cumulus. Its a type of cloud but really… The bar is far from “heavenly”. HAHAHA. I suggest for you not to get any drinks there because my Sex on the beach was white instead of the regular pink.

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They have a karoke room there till 12am, and movies rooms that operate till 10pm. Quite alot of activities! and we chose the worst one; (thinking about my SOTB. really…)

 

The whole place looks really picturesque at night.

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The famed coconut milkshake. It’s so good you could do 100 laps in the pool and still reach out for another cup of this.

We had nyonya laksa at Jonker’s street after the coconut shake.

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I had the assam, whilst Charles had the curry. The curry one had alot of coconut milk which according to him, is a tradition for nyonya styled curry. Thank god I didn’t order that. My assam laksa was superb. I finished off the entire bowl LMAO.

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We drove to the Porta De Santiago. Had to climb that fleet of stairs, god damn. I wouldn’t have done it if its not for the fact that I consumed too much coconut milkshake.

Got to take a pic with this cute little iguna at only 5RM.

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SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO CUTE. I want an iguna to add to my dream house collection of pets: 2 Sulcata, 1 blue tongued skink, 1 shiba, 1 husky, 1 cockatoo and 1 iguna. HEHEHE.

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Caught the movie “Before I wake” at the theatre. I don’t recall SG having this movie so I think it’s not even due to screen yet. fuck.

They had some kind of event and decorated this place. so cute.

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THE ONLY REASON WHY I CHOOSE THAT THEATRE.

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Fucken delicious chicken meatballs. 15 pcs at only 5.40 RM. God damn, you can’t even buy a btl of mineral water for that value in SG.

I really like that show. I overheard some people commenting about the ending from behind my seat; I think they didn’t quite understand the reasoning behind the story. HAHAHA. It’s good in my opinion. It’s not too scary, relatable and no doubt the kid’s really cute.

And of course…. No one goes to Malaysia and returns without eating at Hui Lau Shan. I chose my CHEWY BALLS. Definitely worth every single step on the treadmill; if I ever go to the gym. HAHAHA.

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THE LAST DINNER

We first started off with this for appetizer. Popiah stuffed with a truck load of “fried pork lard“. GOD DAMN I TELL UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

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We then waited really long, for this street stall that sells everything boiled and drizzled with some special house mix sauce. DAMN FUCKING AWESOME OMG D:

Cockles (i dont eat that tho), La La, lady’s fingers, cuttlefish, mixed fishcakes. I was so sad when we finished our food knowing we can’t order anymore cuz need to wait all over again. LOL.

BACK ALLEY SIHAM, LALA, SNAIL & CUTTLEFISH @ TONG BEE’s STALL, OFF JALAN BUNGA RAYA, MELAKA.

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You need to try this for sure if you are going Melaka.

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We headed out to this stretch of field at night. To visit a “Most beautiful starbucks in Malaysia” as per Charles’ claim.

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I saw the starbucks and I wuz liek:

i want to like it but its hard

Is it… really the most beautiful one in Malaysia? -_____-

So anyway since we were there we definitely had to play some bubbles before we left. LOL

It was only 5RM for that soap dish. And the hanging rods are all for different bubble styles. The wind was strong and thus needless to say we had bubbly good fun. HAHA

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They kinda look like different ways to torture your sub… if you look at it from 50 shades of grey point of view. LOL.

I just had to take a snap of this little shitty bubble destroying boy in the red pants. God damn bursting all my bubbles. <PUN INTENDED.

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There’s no better supper than oyster omelette cooked by an old man in this huge oily wok over a roaring fire. True story.

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The oysters were so fresh, and the eggs + starch was so well cooked that you can taste wok hei. I FINISHED THE WHOLE GOD DAMN “LARGE” portion because they were stuffed to their faces.

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Nick ordered this nine treasures soup that was some kind of a dessert. AND IT HAD MACARONI INSIDE LOL.

And no, he didnt eat the pasta. HAHAHAHA.

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Ended the night with me tucking maomaocong to bed.

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AND RIGHT BEFORE THE LIGHTS WENT OUT A FUCKING BEETLE JUST HAD TO FLY AROUND MY EAR MAKING THAT ” ZZz Z z ZZ zzz Zz!” SOUND AND LANDING ON MY HAIR.

I died that night.

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We had one last meal before we left. With just a few dollars left (after spending way too much overeating ). It’s the famous chicken rice balls at Jonker’s street.

The old man attending to us had attitude problem but OK. FOR THE SAKE OF FOOD. OK. I WILL PUT UP WITH U.

The balls paired with the chilli were so good, they could turn a straight man gay.

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The chicken however looks like a plate of gruesomely murdered flesh that will totally score negative for presentation in front of Gordon Ramsay. And I daresay Sg’s chickens are done tastier 😀 😀 😀

I HAD ALL 5 BALLS AND THEY ORDERED EXTRA 20 BALLS AND THEY FINISHED IT.

A must try!

I had a last shower in his house (They have a WELL) and we had to scoop water out of a huge tub to shower in with concrete walls and floor and everything. So rustic. Charles say sometimes toads and frogs will appear in the tub. Thank god i like them.

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I enjoyed my time in Melaka, be sure to try out all these food if you go there. And you must visit Port Dickson. I want to stay at Grand Lexis next time. HEHE.

Will upload my Bintan post soon. ❤

Please drop me an email or a message if you need help finding the food places. Charles dont’ have the exact address but he can give ambiguous directions to getting there. Better than nothing la. LOLOL.

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Just one last photo for you guys, from my last shoot. Black and white so awesome.

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Bye guys 😀

 

 

 

 

 

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Food gracious me

I swear I feel like I am the world’s laziest person ever whenever I see the gigantic gap of the days in between each post.

I have been having too much fun every day after leaving the terrible office life that its getting criminal. So here I present to you my food findings just, you know, to make you envious and wishing you’ll have some time off to slack.

Its surprising how some people have this concept that people who “throw letter” (tender resignation) before finding another job are just being lazy and try to make up excuses. My standard reply to people like that, I tell them “Being unemployed is a luxury in Singapore. Bitch, I’m luxurious.”

You gotta admit, its true. HAHAHAHA. When I was stuck in the office job, I always go to work 35 mins earlier, and leave later than stipulated. And every single day I am desperately crawling towards the weekend. Some people like that routine and stability, but I can’t.

I AM A DANDELION. 

Anyway yes I have been trying to cram in as many activities as I can into these 2 short months before the review (for my next job) date is due, end May. I mentioned in my previous post that I will be going to Boracay BUT WHAT THE FUCK the plane timings are so weird and they don’t cater flights every other day.

WILL I BE STRANDED IN PINOYLAND IN THIS CASE? AND THEN I WILL HAVE TO GO PLAY LAN WITH THEM AND PEOPLE WILL SCOLD ME PUTAINGA MO. 

So yes sadly I changed it to Phuket. Boracay will have to wait till I find a PH boyfriend. ;D

My first stop will be Melaka this weekend. So, wait for me 😀

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So yes some goddess reviews. I love to eat but I am not hipster enough to do cafe hopping all the time (because most of these  places ulu as fuck and I only got my legs and an ezlink)

The hugely raved Spathe (Yes I did my online homework)

SPATHE PUBLIC HOUSE,
8 Mohamed Sultan Rd #01-01, 238958

 

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The exterior looks like some taiwanese eatery that sells pork buns and stuff. HAHAHA.

I love the interior though. Bricks. I just have this really unexplained fetish for all kinds of bricks. LOL.

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Yes, I just wanted to take a selfie with the brick wall behind. JUST HAD TO.

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It’s a simple menu with just a few choices. I, obviously took the most gluttonous one which was the heartiest full American breakfast and eggs done scrambled. Paired it with a strawberry lime cider.

I personally prefer Rekorderlig to Kopparberg.

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The highlight was the scrambled. It was done really really well. I still can’t really figure what did they put inside. But I’m sure there some sort of cooking cream/ milk kind of dairy. How else is it so moist and creamy!?!?!?!? :O

Everything else was so-so. The bread was the most O.O I didn’t touch it after one bite. The mushrooms were also really rich and creamy, and bacon was really salty thus if you add everything up you feel abit sick halfway through the meal.

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And of course we just had to have it served on some sort of a hipsterish wooden serving board.

I R8 it 7/10 for decor, 6/10 for value, and 7/10 for food.

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Just in case you guys have not realized it Sherlocks is here to inform he discovered that your goddess really likes brunches. All day breakfasts ; the creamy scrambled eggs, the smell of freshly brewed tea and coffee + daily made bread with snowy butter. GOD DAMN FOOOD. WHY AM I SO FAT, I JUST WANT TO EAT EVERYTHING.

The exercise that you need to do after that….

i cant do this

But who cares right.

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My next stop:

Fourty Hands
78 Yong Siak Street, #01-12, 163078

One of the really super ulu places. Thank god my friend drove. But even so we had to find it using GPS.

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I really really liked the decor of this place. All the little ornaments reminded me of the little trinkets that i will download in my sims 3 to spruce up the place. Everything there had a rustic feel and that’s my favorite.

I was seated right in front of the daily made goods. Looks really pleasing.

I ordered fresh orange juice with OF COURSE, THE BREAKFAST PLATTER. My friend ordered eggs Benedict with steak and potatoes.

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I prefer this one to the one at Spathe because I like my food to be comfort-ish. (Like, wet and sloppy). They have the beef sauce here which I really love as it seem to wonderfully complete the otherwise rather dry food items.

Loved the sausage, bacon was not too salty. Tomatoes were well grilled, you can still taste that charcoal.Mushrooms and scrambled were good, however the ones at Spathe were creamier and more flavorful.

And as for the flatbread/ pita.. it was O.O as well. I didn’t eat it after one bite. SOUNDS FAMILIAR. LOL. I think it would have been better if the dough was spread out thinner or maybe just hotter. This one was cold and the spread given was too little.

I wouldn’t have minded just traditional bread slices or a bun.

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Eggs Benedict was really good. Steak was nice, bun was soft and well toasted. The eggs…. Well I daresay it was done to perfection. Both eggs were round and beautifully shaped. Just the right temperature.

Potatoes were extremely delicious.

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I R8 8/10 for decor, 8/10 for value, 8/10 for food. It is definitely worth a visit. DESPITE IT BEING AT SOME REALLY RANDOM PLACE IN SINGAPORE. Just when you think Singapore is really small……

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After brunch, obviously it’s time to show somewhere to bring your girlfriend to for a fancy dinner. You know, just to show that you really love her and all.

I finally got to try Morton’s.

Morton’s, The Steakhouse
6 Raffles Blvd, Marina Square, 039797

It’s located inside Mandarin Oriental. And yes it’s pricey af.

IT FILLS YOU UP BUT EMPTIES YOU AT THE SAME TIME. *HA HA HA*

 

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This is the Morton’s bar, famous for their cocktails.

 

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I swear you could feel your wallet crying when you step into the restaurant.

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You can find their full menu on their website as well.

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My friend and I shared a Signature cut new york strip 20 Oz. He had shrimp alexander for starters whilst I had a crab cake.

Our meat was accompanied by sauteed mushrooms with spinach and mashed potatoes. MY ABSOLUTE FAV.

Restaurant was dimly lit and I was shooting with my shitty Iphone so yes I had to artificially brighten all the photos. The ambiance was good. We had some obnoxious Singaporean guy making alot of fuss next table but other than that it was all good.

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The shrimps were fresh and FREAKING ASS HUGE. LIKE REALLY.

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JUST LOOK IT CAN FILL UP THE ENTIRE CIRCUMFERENCE OF THE BREAD ROLL PLATE. I’M NOT SHITTING YOU. But then again for such a hefty price I kinda expected the prawns to get up and dance jazz.

My crab cake:

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It was tasty, but the one I had in HongKong “The steakhouse” is much much better.

One half of the steak, medium rare; accompanied by mash with sour cream, a thick slab of butter and bacon. And of course, the spinach with mushrooms.

 

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It was good steak. I felt it was well prepared. It was balanced, and done-ness was on point. My chef friend said it wasn’t well rested after searing which resulted in alot of juice but hell I liked it anyway. As you know, I like stuff wet 😉

Potatoes were so sinful you’d be in heaven after a taste. Spinach was good but a tad too salty.

My friend had Crème brûlée for dessert which I opted for an extremely light one. Fresh strawberries with whipped cream. It doesn’t get any better than this.

It was really delicious.

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Give this place a try if you are just like me, REALLY LOVE YOUR STEAKS. And if you have extra to spare.

I R8 9/10 for ambiance, 9/10 for food.

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Ok that’s enough of food for now.

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I went to Aeon ( My regular Korean doctor for my laser ) to do a much hyped Hydro facial. The trial price was affordable. It was really good. *UPDATED as of 6/8* They no longer offer the trial due to overwhelming response but it is really good guys. I highly recommend it.

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They use a suction kind of tool to extract dirt instead of the old fashioned metal stick (remember my previous post I told you how the metal stick caused all the scars that I have till today)

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So this suction method is actually painless and scarless. Which is what you want. Weather is so bad recently so this hydro facial really worked so well. Just look at my skin. Shiny and fresh. HAHAHA.

If you are interested in the trial, please do drop by the clinic at

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9 Scotts Road #06-02/03 Scotts Medical Centre @ Pacific Plaza, 228210

This is their official website: http://www.aeonmedical.com.sg

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If you are interested in the laser or any other services, you can quote my name or just name my blog Voir Valeisky and they will give you a good price.

I bought a CC cream from them. 45 Dollars. Ok for sensitive and oily skin.

Before and after: (Sorry lighting is fucked as usual)

It sorts out the discoloration and uneven skin tone + gives extremely good coverage.

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So yes, I promise I will blog about my Melaka trip as soon as I am back. I PROMISE. OMG NO, YOU NEED TO HAVE FAITH IN ME.

OK I WILL LOOK AT THIS GIF EVERY DAY I PROMISE.

Here, have some pics of me and lycan if you miss me whilst Im gone.

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Bye for now guys. Love ya.